I have learned many facts about mom life just in five short years from the adventures of mom life and had many new experiences. For mother’s day this year, I just want to share a few of the things I have learned from a Christain perspective. Besides, there can always be a part 2 next year!
Patience Lots and Lot’s of Patience-
This past year this has been clearer than ever. We couldn’t go to indoor locations. The year became the year of we. As in I thought I was going to send the darling to school and well, that didn’t happen and I am now staring at another year of homeschool. She is a child who tests boundaries and a mom’s patience at every step. We are also very similar so often it is like I am getting frustrated with a smaller version of myself. But strong-willed littles are tomorrow’s leaders, right?
Being a parent of a special needs child is also not easy and takes a whole other level of patience. Sometimes she cannot speak. I have to be her voice when she becomes frustrated and anxious. God never gives us more than we can handle. However, sometimes as a mom the patience just seems like a heavy load. So I have learned ways to cope. Take time for me even if it’s a ride to the store where I can be with myself and talk to God or sing insanely loud. It also takes patience with not just my child but everyone around me that thinks they know the answers. God didn’t create anyone perfect. We are lumps of clay to be molded by the potter himself. Only He truly has the answers
Even with my own husband. I have had to learn patience with our child. Sometimes we do not see eye to eye. We were raised in totally different households and it isn’t always easy. I was raised in a theater family in Westchester. I now love hugging trees. My husband grew up on a rural farm in Dutchess County. He uses trees as firewood. So being patient and finding common ground is something that is a work in progress between us.
Kids Can do awesome stuff Which leads to Inspiration for Mom-
My child has taught me so much. She has done more than some adults and pushed limits in crazy ways. During the pandemic we became wanderers. We walked into the woods and started wandering. She was only four when the pandemic hit. We went to remote locations. Bushwhacked. Rock scrambled and at times I wanted to give up. But, she pushed me on. We are now over 700 miles and she has done most on her own two feet over the last five years. We completed probably 200 plus since the Pandemic started in March 2020. So it taught me to not say “I can’t” but instead, I can. Our Bible verse is “I can do all things through Christ Who Strengthens Me.” Phil 4:13. My child has shown me that this is completely possible.
Not in My Time-
I tried and tried to always do things in my way and my time. However, this isn’t even Biblically Possible. My child has really shown me that things happen in God’s Time. Not my time. I cannot have it my way.
Right down to my pregnancy. I was ready to go back into acting. Go on a tour. Leave my husband in the dust for a while and guess what happened? I got pregnant after years and years with my husband. My first pregnancy test wasn’t even positive. But, I did the moonwalk across the floor while singing can’t touch this. My husband said it’s up to God and ya know what? A few weeks later a loud voice woke me up at about 2 am and told me to go take another pregnancy test. I laughed and guess what? The test was very positive. I couldn’t have it my way. But ultimately my daughter’s unplanned entrance was the best miracle that ever happened to me.
Even now, I mentioned before the year of me and now it is we. I was really excited to work on my own. Set forth on my new journey while my child was at school and well, again not up to me and that was not His plan. God had other plans. Remember Proverbs 16:9?
The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.
And this past year during the Pandemic, I left it all up to Him and more doors have opened than they ever would if I would have had the year of me. I knocked and He answered.
“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you” Matthew 7:7
So my child showing me how I need to leave it up to God has actually worked really well. He has established my steps into very cool directions and I couldn’t ask for a better person to step with than my mini-me even though sometimes she can drive me a tad bonkers. We have knocked on many doors together and they have taken us on awesome adventures.
I have learned children are always watching their mom …
She wants to be just like mom. Which I think is fairly common especially in the younger years. I know as a teenager all I wanted to do was run away from my parents. But I feel like if I set a strong Christian foundation for her maybe she won’t ever want to run away from me or maybe just run away for a bit and come back.
I love this parable in the Bible:
The Wise and Foolish Builders
“Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.”
So I try to build a strong Christian foundation for her to follow and hopefully she will be like me and follow in example in all her ways as she grows.
start children off in the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it. Proverbs 26:6
And because my child is watching me I have to work on weak areas in my life such as my tongue because children are like little parrots. They repeat everything. I mean everything and I have to come up with some quick answers. Have to hold that tongue.
keep your tongue from evil and your lips from telling lies Proverbs 34:13
And let me tell you, the tongue is quick and saying some wicked stuff. So instead I have had to learn to use my mouth for good. Like lifting others up and being positive. Especially now in times that can seem so dark with no end in sight.
But even things she does. Most recently the potato man she drew on the bedroom wall to keep shadows away. I just rolled with it after I calmly explained why we don’t draw on walls. Obviously, there are times when she needs to know she did wrong and there are consequences. It’s just a matter of how and what spews from the depths of my large, booming mouth. Hold that tongue. My husband likes to remind me about how loud I constantly am. I simply tell him that I’m projecting.
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An Unexplainable Love-
Love is Patient, Love is kind, Love is so many things, and having a child is all these things and more. My daughter and I have a saying, it’s Me and her against the world. A mother’s love is losing sleep, wiping boogery noses, being there to cheer them on and dry their tears. Last week, Abby ended up getting very ill. It took a day and a half of me being right by her side. If I moved, she would scream in fear. I got zero work done. But, my child comes first, and my love for her.
My husband has lost a lot less sleep than I. I even co-sleep with mine right now because of situations that have come up. My husband moved into my daughter’s room for happy nights of peaceful slumber amongst the unicorns and fuzzy pink blankets. But a mother’s love. I cannot even truly fully explain it. It has pushed me and made me a better person. Even though I think I will be sleep-deprived for the foreseeable future. Besides God, I will never love anyone more than my little girl. But, it’s a different type of love. Like I said, an unexplainable love.
Still Learning About Mom Life
I’m still learning. Remember, God knew us before we were born. He created each person unique and special in their own ways with their own talents, gifts. I’m not sure if I will have another child. It’s not up to me. But, I guarantee you that the second child would be a whole other experience. Some things might be similar. But, like I said every person is unique like the stars in the sky or the snowflakes that fall in winter’s breath. So each parenting experience is unique too. The journey I am on with my daughter will continue to teach me new things and toss me curveballs. But, ultimately with God by my side, I know I have this and He won’t steer me wrong.
Therefore, I ask every mother reading this today to look inside themselves and see what their children have taught them? When you take a minute to step back and think about it, you will be amazed by everything our children have taught us. I’m ready for the next chapter. Are you?
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