Kindness and respect are forgotten for some in an attempt to keep social distancing practices and follow all these new mandated or suggested rules in a world wrought by the pandemic. Sadly, it is filtering down to our children. However, with some tips and tricks, we can prepare our child for situations that arise making them an awesome member of society!
A Personal Account and Tips to Help Everyone Succeed
*Please keep in mind this is my personal account and feelings about the situation in order to give tips and tricks in case you find yourself in a similar situation.
Recently we went to the playground and there was a little girl there about my daughter’s age and she kept running away from Abby. Abby had talked all the way there about how she can’t wait to make friends so she seemed a little upset that this girl pretty much was running away from her with no explanation besides “this girl won’t stop following me!” The mother turned around to my child and replied, “she’s trying to keep her distance.” Distance from what? My four-year-old child is supposed to understand?
Tip #1
Be Clear in your message. Don’t be vague. It just will lead to misconceptions and hurt feelings.
Dialogue example: My daughter is distancing because she is worried about the sickness going around and doesn’t know you. So she would rather play with people she knows.
About ten minutes later, another girl about their age shows up and they run to each other and hug leaving my child more upset and confused than before. The mother never spoke to me or my daughter. I took my child aside and tried to explain to her the situation. Not an easy task with a young child that already suffers from social anxiety. All she could see is that she was being rejected.
Tip # 2
Explain to your child that not every child will want to play with you. Don’t take it to heart.
At one point both mothers had their backs turned whispering to each other as I explained the situation to my husband on the phone. They could have just been talking about a new recipe. It just didn’t personally feel as if that was the situation.
Tip #3
Take it with a grain of salt. Gossip, back talking and clicks have been around forever. Try your hardest to ignore it and enjoy time with your child. You could be the issue in making assumptions. Neither party involved knows the other person’s story.
Just Remember that grownups need to be kind and respectful. It starts with us. Children see us being rude and will think it is alright. They see us panicking and scared, often times they will act the same. Children see us judging and they will judge.
Eventually, the situation turned into my daughter sobbing in my arms and the other mom picked up her other child and walked away.
Tip #4
Be prepared to give your child lots of love if they are rejected and remind them that it isn’t them. Even try to redirect them to get their mind off of the current situation. You might end up having to play pretend ice cream stand, but as parents sometimes we have to do what we have to do to make the situation better.
I ended up playing with my child as she still occasionally glanced at the two girls having an awesome time. A great time without her. But was coping better with mom by her side.
I overheard that this was their first play-date in four months. Awesome for them. Had to be great that these two friends were reunited. However, how the beginning happened to set a mood for the rest of the trip.
Another observation was the other girls repeatedly cut my child off without an “excuse me” or a “can I have a turn?” But the main point is how this was all handled and the reactions.
Tip #5
Teach respectful dialogue. Please, thank you, excuse me, can I have a turn? Simple phrases if they are not comfortable around children they do not know to possibly help the other child understand. Be prepared as a parent (on both ends) to step in. As mentioned before, just leaving it as “my child wants to keep her distance” leaves a mixed single for the other child. A safe distance why?
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Three Final Tips-
- Everything starts at home. Especially when the children have only been at home since this started. For small children, keep it simple but informative. Teach kindness and respect. Show them the right way to live without being afraid and when they are scared, how to conquer their fears.
- Encourage games on the playground that the children can play together while maintaining distance. If children want to play together.
- Remember everyone has different views of what is safe right now. This includes social distancing practices. Different people have gone through different situations.
Some might say, why didn’t you just leave? Well just like that family, we are allowed to be there and shouldn’t have to give up our fun time. When we got there, there was a family in masks. They weren’t comfortable. They left. But, we wanted to stay and play.
Final Thoughts on Kindness-
Following simple tips and trips can help your child navigate the playgrounds and that will resonate into all they do in life making them an awesome individual.
Side Thoughts-
It’s a blessing and a curse being a travel and adventure blogger during this new time. We see a lot and the world often seems very upside down and different. We are encountering things we never imagined. But, we also are able to bring our experiences both the good and the ugly back to our readers keeping everyone informed.
Also, for every bad experience, we end up with ten beautiful experiences. For example, we went to a resort overnight recently. At dinner, Abby met another little girl. They hit it off immediately. They played together, held hands, hugged, and even helped each other several times whether it was feeding the horses or breaking into the goat pen. The other little girl just kept her mask on.
Onto our next adventure and never forget that golden rule! Remember not to get so wrapped up in the “new normal” that we end up hurting those around us. Children learn through their environment. We need to start at home. This is all new for everyone. But, we can grow and improve.
What if the situation escalates? We are walking a fine line between bullying and rudeness at this point. So if you feel it has gone beyond that line, then there is help. Read below.
For more facts about bullying visit: https://www.stopbullying.gov/resources/get-help-now
For Posts About Kindness and Friendship Read these awesome experiences:
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