Yes, you read that correctly. My name is Erica otherwise known as Abby Girl’s mom and I was the moronic hiker. Four days and today is the first day we truly ventured out since last week. Even one day in the house with an Abby is rough. Beyond that is simply ridiculous. It isn’t just the fact we are trapped at home … We are trapped where I was in bed for three days pretty much not able to function. All because I didn’t follow some very basic hiker rules. Rules that hopefully after people read this story will see are very clear and necessary so that they are not dubbed the moronic hiker too.

It all started last Tuesday

on one of our many adventures in the local woods. I brought the dog and Abby and I got lazy about wearing my boots, bringing a first aid kit or my trusty bandanna. I completely ignored my top five backpacking essentials that are usually are on me. Ultimately this poor decision had horrible consequences.

I figured it’s an easy hike and a mile if I’m lucky … What’s the worst that could happen?

Well, my child decided she wanted to rock scramble just off the trail. I checked it first for snakes as my husband always warns us of off-trail climbing because of rattlesnake and copperheads. I went to follow her. However, she was already at the top. I figured I will just go to the side and pull myself. The ground isn’t too bad. Fact, it has rained non-stop recently. So as I stepped, I came down on a jagged rock and slide. So after a bit of her not listening, she decided she wanted up. My adrenaline kicked in as I walked with her on my back and dragged my fat, stubby-legged dog about a quarter mile uphill with blood running down my leg.

Back at the car …

I cleaned it by flushing it with an unopened jug of water and wiped it with a hand wipe. No, no #1, you are not supposed to use hand wipes on a dirty open wound. It can strip the good bacteria. I had the kids both furry and wild in the car with AC on as I did all this. I got in the car and began to drive. That’s when the adrenaline wore off and my leg was just a tad angry. It was also the leg I needed to drive my car. But, I made it home.

Husband advise sucked

My husband told me to use bag balm cause it appeared to be more bruised than anything with some scratches. No, no #2. You need to clean it and put a good triple antibiotic ointment, then cover! So that Thursday, I was not feeling right all day. Off and dizzy. Very tired. By afternoon, I had spiked a wicked fever, horrible sore throat, chills, body aches, dizzy, migraine. So here comes the no, no #3, I consulted my mom’s group for advice. I thought I had gotten a virus visiting my mother in law in hospital since I was told a virus was going around. I decided to ride it out for a bit as I debated.

Friday

All-day spent in bed unable to eat. Friday night, I began stomach pains. I’m not sure if it was the Advil I had taken every four hours to keep fever and throat swelling down or the progressing health issue. My house at this point, in the main living area, was almost impassable and my child was going full-on Lord of The Flies.

Saturday morning

I walked into the bedroom and announced if my husband had no other plans, I was going right down the road to urgent care, watch the Abby Monster.

At urgent care, I was five minutes early and at the point, standing was hard. Not sure how I drove myself there. They left me sitting on the pavement with back against the front of the building. The doctor strolled passed me and didn’t say anything. I got in and sat. Then I sat some more. For urgent care, a twenty-minute wait isn’t too bad except when you feel like death’s girlfriend.

I was looked at by a nurse and then the doctor. They really didn’t do much. They didn’t even clean it. She told me to go home and soak it, then scrub it with a washcloth. I’m pretty tough and even that sounded nasty. Especially on a shin and when I did do as they said, later on, I found the one area riddled with infection. I also have a thing about touching my bones. I know, I’m very weird.

However, after lots of comments about the poor state of my throat, not good looking wounds and me screaming in my hoarse voice, I’m going to puke as she swabbed my throat for strep, The doctor concluded from my symptoms that it was bacterial and came from my injury. The strep test was negative. A prescription was sent to the pharmacy and I headed to the grocery store.

The walking dead …

After dragging myself through the grocery store like a character from Walking dead, I went home to pudding. I rested all day and didn’t leave. Abby was freed once to go to the store with her dad.

Here I sit, Sunday and feel on the mend. I’m on amoxicillin. The doctor said Advil was fine every four hours. However, I switched to Tylenol because I don’t need stomach bleeding too. I was able to go to the store today and did better than yesterday. My house is horrible, the kitchen is scary, and the child best not slam into my leg one more time. Oh, and then today, I tried to clean and slit my little finger open on a cat food container top. I can’t catch a break. I am also tired of nursing home food. Overcooked vegetables, pudding, more pudding, liquids, mushy stuff and I graduated to small pieces of food. The best part has been the multiple milkshakes. So this is my adventure for this week.

Post update

The fever broke and sore throat was improved but the stomach issues and chest pain sent me to primary the next day … I was still having massive internal issues. The doctor prescribed steroids and anti-nausea medication. I lost ten pounds and killed my immune system. In fact, a month after this post, I ended up in the ER with another horrendous sore throat and stomach issues. I was told it was viral. My body was ravaged from one simple hike. I got sick several times after that and fought many colds. Now I take elderberry at first signs of anything. The funny part is, I ended up gaining about 25 pounds after losing ten and feel like a yo-yo. Tomorrow, I meet a new doctor and express my concerns.

fun facts-

Trust your gut

Should’ve gone to ER

Wear the right shoes while adventuring no matter how small or simple the adventure

Always carry a first aid kit

Never get comfortable in your adventuring

If you happen to find yourself in some dumb luck, make sure you have lots of activities your child can do while you heal

Don’t rely on anyone’s advice, especially your husband

Final Thoughts

As always, hope you enjoyed the read. Remember, don’t be the moronic hiker. However, if you do have a moronic hiker story, send it to me and I will add you to this post! Until next time.

Sometimes, mom life turns us into true mama bears. In this story, there are two examples of how mama bear had to show herself. Life is never dull.

Mom Life Story #1-Bowdoin Park and the toy that was taken

Abby insisted on walking with a couple of her toys. Her mouse even dipped her toes in cool stream. She hiked for a bit and then of course wanted “up” and I had left the pack in the car. So I got her up on my shoulders and we howled loudly for the whole world to hear. I bet people there was a Sasquatch or crazy people in the woods. We were really loud! We were hiking near a monastery and I think we went by a Monk. He was very nice and said hi.

I let her pick all the directions and she took us to a dead end. So we turned around and headed back because she wanted to go to the playground. We walked by a group of school children and I asked if they wanted to have her for a bit as she seemed to blend right in. We laughed and kept walking. I asked her if she had to potty and she no and pottied her stuffed animal instead.

We made it playground and she was squealing with excitement. She kept taking her toys and putting them down the slide first and then following. Abby tossed a toy down the fireman pole and a boy around age six looked right at her and proceeded to steal her toy. She looked devastated. I being mama bear looked right and him and said “that’s not yours, give it back, please.” He ignored me and started messing with it and walking away. I once again reminded him and eventually went over and took it from him. No parent around. I returned it to my daughter who was not happy.

Time to Leave the Area …

She decided it was time to leave that section of playground. She had a friend from music there and he was ignoring her. So I think she just had enough. It made me upset that a children can be so rude so young. My child is not perfect, and has her moments. Trust me. But, blatant rudeness is so frustrating. I can understand the little boy from her class not wanting to play because he had another friend with him. But, what I can’t understand is the other child who saw her toss it and took off with it with a parent standing next to him. So that was an adventure in itself. All I can do as a parent is try and continue to teach my child how to be a kind human-being with manners. Sorry, temporary mom rant. I am back. 

Read an awesome post about an experience of kindness here!

After playing alone for a bit, she said “done.” It isn’t uncommon for her to become quickly bored on a playground. So combined with everything else, I knew she was done. We left and went on our next awesome adventure … Grocery shopping! She gets her own cart and even will checkout at self checkout!

Mom Life #2- Hike on Burger Hill, Rhinebeck NY

So I got a bug up my butt and headed out with Abby to Burger Hill before preschool library time. My calves were burning!!!! Like seriously on fire. So out of shape. I seriously feel like a bear emerging from hibernation. Put on twenty plus pounds over the five months of inactivity. But I saw a little bird sitting on the hill in what seemed a mile into the clouds. The bird kept me going and I started turning the bird and the hill into a life metaphor after a couple rough days. I almost puked but I made it.

I got to top and let Abby down to romp. She reached in pack and gave me a straw for my water. I was so thirsty. I put my lips on the straw And it tasted like bug spray!!!! Ugh. But, I smiled, said thank you and hid the straw.

After a little while Abby was ready to go. Of course going downhill, she wanted to walk. Of course. She reminded me of the little girl from little house on the prairie. Frolicking about. She took my camera and was snapping photos until she fell and scraped up her knee.

So I carried her a 1/4 to car … Then we headed to library time.

Conclusion-

Here are two prime examples of a mama bear. One time where the claws and fierce roar came out to protect her little cub. The other time was more an emergence from winter hibernation. Onto mama bear and Abby Girl’s next adventure…

Thank you for reading! As always-Peace, Love and French Fries-Adventures of Abby Girl

We love hiking the Hudson Valley. However, this time did not go as planned.  It became a short hike with many attack bugs and so much mud.  Yes, this was going to be an interesting hike. In fact, it ended up being one of those days overall. Most of Abby Girl’s clothes and parts of of my body would sadly become a casualty.

The Beginning-

I started out the day not able to find my dogs leash or collar or harness. I should have taken it as a sign from above. But I didn’t and proceeded to load my 2.5 yr old and perfectly plump canine into the vehicle and went.

After stopping at tag sale because my daughter can always use more stuff we stopped at store for a leash for my dog not child to clarify as she has been wearing the dog’s collar recently … But I’m not paying almost ten dollars when I know it’s somewhere in my house. My daughter probably was wearing it and hid it somewhere. So I was going to to say screw it and forego the hike, but as the sky seemed to clear I said, “self we will go for a hike”. I know of places where my dog doesn’t need to be leashed.

Side Note: I have recently found in a hiking no leash or collar emergency, the dollar store often has some sort of selection and they do just fine

The Hike-

We couldn’t go far because my car is on a slow and painful death so we swung into one of our local, lovely nature preserve. Luckily, no one was there most likely because it was 100 percent humidity and the bugs are out in full attack mode. Loaded the dog out of car, and child … Got bug spray lathered me and child in it and off we went.

Who knew so much could happen in .5 miles! My daughter had to pee. She started squatting with her panties still on cause the concept of peeing in the woods is so much different than at home. Pull down your stuff and go. But, no .

So as I hastily pull everything down, underwear, socks and shoes become a casualty. I was able to spare the skirt.

She then asked to lose the skirt and I say fine, you have a fairly long shirt on and no one is around. But shortly thereafter, she asks for her tutu back. Most likely because bugs were biting her butt.

Then on way back and may I add, .1 mile from car, my child decides to jump in a tiny stream. The same stream I tried to clean panties in and turned black from swamp mud. They ended up in the trash. No amount of stain product was saving them.

Up And down she jumped and yes, the “tutu” fell off. Black. So she finally gets bored and asks to go. So I put her tiny bare butt on my back, yell for dog and head back to car.

A final insult was my failed bug spray as I was carrying her and some kamikaze bug got my elbow. I can’t defend myself as my arms were holding tiny legs. If I attempt to swat bugs, child goes down. I took the bite for my daughter because I am an awesome mom.

We make it back to car. Load everyone in and home again we go. My very fun and buggy hike. FYI I am the only one who got attacked … Is it because I am so sweet? Hahahahahaha.

Closing Thoughts-

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